Summer School

What can I say? Its nice out, bar review has begun, I’ve been caddying, and I’ve even managed to interview for an in-house position with a local company. Therefore, the MN Life has been sorely neglected.

After every year of law school I rewarded myself with at least a week or two away from the grind. I would maximize the amount of time I spent on a golf course, drink cocktails outdoors, and avoid reading anything heavier than a newspaper. The promise of an uber layed-back lifestyle, even though temporary, was the carrot that got me through the battle that was spring finals.

This time around, I was afraid that bar review classes would be too much too soon. Nobody wants to spend precious summer days listening to some unfamiliar professor drone-on giving you the legal version of Cliffs Notes. I had avoided any sort of summer school, and I had witnessed how even one summer undergraduate class would intrude upon my friends’ summer time fun.

I was worried BarBri would turn me into a crabby bastard. But, so far it hasn’t been too bad. Now, I’m not going to go as far as to say that it’s been enjoyable, but it isn’t terrible either. The professors are decent, I get to hang-out with friends, and three hours a day is manageable. Besides, there is little doubt that BarBri will increase my chances of passing the bar exam. And that is a comforting thought.

* Coming soon: Pictures of Mike and Tammi’s wedding celebration.

Nucking Futts

Today on Pardon the Interruption I saw an interesting story. Pat Robertson claims to be able to leg press 2000 pounds. It is probably a typo. But if you've seen Pat Robertson on the 700 club lately you would know that even 200 pounds seems like a stretch.

Either way.... that must be one hell of a shake.

Getting My Daily Dose of 411

Graduation has come and gone. I strutted across the stage, I hosted the family, and I had a great time visiting with my fellow graduates throughout the festivities. I especially enjoyed the steak I had on Friday afternoon, thank you Andy for making the trip to Forsters in Plymouth. (David, you need to try one of these) And though I never actually climbed into the ring at Upper-Cut, it was interesting to see the inside of a real live gym. Langino’s mug is plastered all over the walls; I guess no one around here has ever seen an Italian boxer/lawyer kick so much butt before. But then again... who has?

I have to admit that I’ve been a little unplugged from the broader world for the better part of the last month. The last three weeks of school was all consuming (due to my ‘ahem’ “condensed studying”), plus I was trying to maintain a full social schedule, and get the house in shape to entertain the family. Not that I’m complaining, everybody is busy, but there was not a whole lot of time to read my favorite blogs or newspapers.

Even though I have been in a news depravation chamber I call “my life,” it has been impossible to miss the fact that immigration (legal or otherwise) is a problem. The immigration issue is not just any run-of-the-mill problem either. It is an intricate, complex, beguiling puzzle that has no easy answers. Solving the “immigration problem” (And by “Immigration problem” most Americans mean “Mexican-immigration problem”) will take a steady multi-faceted effort by numerous private, federal, and local agencies. At this point America cannot realistically expect to be able to completely stop the flow of illegal immigrants through the great Southern deserts. Americans should not expect anything other than a reduction of illegal immigrants. And how significant that reduction ultimately is remains to be seen.

Until there is a dramatic economic upswing in Mexico or a substantial downturn in the American economy there will be pressure on the poor and able to cross the boarder. Money is a powerful motivator. And not just from the immigrants’ perspective either. Big business and consumers both benefit from cheap imported labor. The law of supply and demand is creating an undeniable incentive for Mexicans to illegally cross the boarder and for American companies and consumers to look the other way. Couple the monetary incentives with America’s painfully slow bureaucracy and you get an “immigration problem.”

President Bush being a great leader and visionary had concluded that the already overworked National Guard should “support” Boarder Patrol efforts. This is not a solution, this is rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic. Illegal immigration will not be stopped through use of force. Deploying the National Guard to halt illegal immigration is like putting a band-aid on a leaky pipe.

Illegal Immigration was the one issue I thought the former Governor of Texas would understand.

What I Learned In Law School

I have been baptized in the law. Three years of rigorous instruction plied and shaped my thought process. My brain is full of Constitutional law, Family law, Torts, Property, Administrative law, Local Government law, Tax, Sports law, Statutory Interpretation, Evidence, Death Penalty, International Human Rights law, Land Use Planning, Criminal law, Civil Procedure, Contracts, and Regulated Industries.

Like most educational opportunities in life, the most meaningful lessons did not involve the classroom. The ‘law experience’ itself was much more illuminating and valuable than any classroom instruction could be. And more than any other, law school taught me it is more important to know what you don’t know than to know what you do know.

Know thy self.

Law school taught me how to deal with printers and their universal tendency to malfunction at inopportune times. Sometimes, even though it would be better to seek help, deadlines were approaching and I had no choice but to do things myself. Hell, after three years of last minute printing projects, it wouldn’t take much before I could be a printer repair man myself. Removing paper jams, changing toner cartridges, and knowing the exact place to effectively deliver a reset-smack... all in a days work.

Trust thy self.

Legal training has made me a damn fine (if I do say so myself) hoop-jumper-through-guy. No meaningless task can stop me now. You want me to take an original, signed birth certificate plus a copy of “said” document to building A so they can certify it before I run it over to building B across town? No problem, that’s right in my wheel-house. I’ve learned to overcome my incessant need to question the powers that be and/or their inane rules. Law school: How I learned to stop challenging authority, or how I learned to love the process. Sometimes it is just self-important bullshit, and you have to do it anyway.

Laugh at thy self.

I’ve had an amazing opportunity to mingle with truly brilliant individuals. Both fellow students and professors continuously surprised and amazed me. I am lucky to have met so many interesting and wonderful people. Someday I will be able to tell stories about the time I watched the State Supreme Court Justice strike out in slow-pitch softball, how I played bar trivia with a Senator, watched the President’s chief-of-staff riff righteously on his guitar, or the time I "posterized" the CEO of General Mills. I cannot help feeling like I crashed the cool-kids party.

Thank you all my friends, fellow law student or not, my family, my roommates, teammates, and especially Ambular, for without your collective presence, encouragement, and assistance I would not have been able to persevere to the end.

Embrace and celebrate the talent and generousity of those around thy self.

The lessons I learned over the course of the last three years were not necessarily new or earth-shaking. Instead, law school made them more intense and poignant. Perhaps baptism was the wrong analogy; law school was more of a confirmation in the law. Baptism is a passive event; one receives benefits without active participation. Confirmation demands effort, engaged learning, and public displays of your knowledge.

The road has been long, the time has been short, and I will never forget the joys, the stress, the failures, the triumphs, and the people.

A Final Final

11:02 pm

I’m shutting it down for the night. I’m not going to learn anything more about evidence tonight. I just need to go to bed.

I stand on the cusp of my last official law school duty. Only an Evidence final stands between me and graduation. It will not be pretty, but it will get done.

My head is too full of relevance, hearsay, character vs. trait, and unfair prejudice to ponder what law school has meant to yours truly. For the next day or two I will mull that question over, and hopefully it will lead to a revelation. A revelation that will spark a great post, a post which will capture my perceptions, hopes, fears, regrets, and triumphs.

Or maybe I’ll just write post about how friggn’ great it is to be free from the dungeon of Mondale Hall.

Either way I hope you’ll stay-tuned.

Mitch Hedberg: A Comic's Comic

Last night Ambular and I attended the Mitch Hedberg Tribute at the Orpheum Theater. Great show, tons of good comics. We owe a sincere thank you to Sarah for getting us complementary tickets, and to Glen for his willingness to be the third wheel. We both had a really good time. It is completely refreshing to laugh so hard your belly hurts. It’s good for the soul.

Unfortunately, I knew very little about Mr. Hedberg before last night. I only had a vague idea of who he was, and was unfamiliar with his body of work. Therefore, I went into the event with a clean slate, unencumbered with bias, sentimentality, or preconceived notions. My eyes were wide open.

It became abundantly clear very early on that Mitch had left a large footprint in the hearts and minds of standup comedians everywhere. Some of the biggest names in the business turned-out to pay their respects. Most of the comics told stories about how Mitch influenced their own careers, and some got choked-up while they shared their personal tales. Many touching moments were mixed-in with the laughter.

We should all hope that our passing inspires such an outpouring of admiration.